冬鱼的快乐

It is not easy for two persons in such a large world to meet each other, fall in love with each other and then live together in a warm and peaceful home, so to my mind,threaten each other with divorce reckless is not so intelligent or sane, especially in consideration of children. So try to be calm and find a suitable chance to talk with each other, and find out the root of all of the problems, for two persons living together a compromise and understanding to each other is very necessary.
Certainly, all compromise and comprehension has its own limits. Our world nowadays is becoming modern , meanwhile for the women it is still very traditional, all depend on what you think and what you did and will do. According to my opinion, to get really fair with men, women should be financially independent, yes, our world is just a world using money to estimate the value of a person, that is so ironic. Women should not sacrifice all her career for the whole family, because not all of the men can appreciate and thank women for such sacrifice, they just take it as certain, and say, “ see, that is the fate of women”!
So what I want to say is, try your best to do what you can to let your family happy again, but don’t sacrifice your career , your dignity and your confidence any more, we don’t beg for anything especially for love!
When one door to the world in fron of you is closed, God will open another new one for you, hope is alway alive in your heart.:)

[ Last edited by 冬鱼的快乐 on 2004-4-23 at 11:48 ]

冬鱼的快乐

“……你这一生一世，可别去求人家什么。人家心中想给你的，你不用求，人家自然会给你。人家不肯的，你便苦苦哀求也是无用，反而热的人家讨厌……”这是我读武侠小说<<侠客行>>最有共鸣的处世哲学（颇为消极，嘿嘿），这个原理对爱情婚姻我觉得再对没有了。积极地去理解，事情，如果做了积极的努力仍然无可挽回，自然是要毅然舍弃，再去强求只能适得其反，不如洒脱一些，另外今后也不会后悔，不会内疚自己一时冲动，因为毕竟做了努力。
我读了楼主的两篇文章，觉得其实您自己心里已经有了大概的主意，只是投鼠忌器，觉得万事不能两全，患得患失，所以到这里来问问，怎么办呢。只能看您内心更喜欢什么了，如果放弃了这段十年之久的婚姻，您将来会很后悔么，或者您内心因为破除了这个桎梏而更觉得开心自在呢？有所的必有所失，您更在乎什么呢？
人家总说什么七年之痒或是十年什么什么的，我也不明白，所谓的“审美疲倦“这个阶段怎么这么难熬………:)

冬鱼的快乐

Originally posted by 慵懒的猫 at 2004-4-23 11:19 PM:
what you have said is to some degree correct, what does happiness mean, is always a compromise?
It is clear, that her husband doesn't love her und seteem her, without the love can you be happy? Th ...

致:D猫：
compromise 一词用的不妥，我的意思是“宽容”。两人相处若要长久必然是以宽容和理解作为第一原则的，而人在这样的环境下是不是应该容易活得自在和开心呢！？否则总是针尖对麦芒，动辄剑拔弩张，这样的婚姻或爱情没得叫人神经紧张，有不如无。
另外，任何事情都有底线，宽容的底线就是为人的尊严了，超出了这个范围，就没有什么宽容可言了。:)